Thursday, December 22, 2005

"Beware of the moon!"

So says Reverand Clement Hedges, who's terrorized by the Were-Rabbit in Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit. I gotta tell ya this is one cool stop-motion animation film.

After the adventurous pork and the poultry (I mean Babe and Chicken Run) I never thought things can get so dramatic when it comes to animals that humans can ngap ngap ngap. (Pix borrowed from Y!Search)

But then again, sometimes we forget that they are living, breathing things too, just like us. Fortunately Wallace and Gromit of the Anti-Pesto team, along with nature lover Lady Campanula Tottington are heroes to the veggie-lovin rabbits in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit.

I especially enjoyed the script. There's a whole bunch of puns to LOL about if only you're quick enough to spot them. Don't say I didn't ya about the Reverand and the moon!

Monday, December 12, 2005

Done this:

1] Put a new link in my bloggie for Bob-siebaby the man who sings his heart out and says all the nice things at the right time.

2] Put a new link to Ariel's new blog, which is still a magical wordical adventure eventhough she claims she's no longer a creature of the divine sort. (Yo Ariel, the word "wordical" is just like geramity, and that means I invented it. I like it cause it rhymes at the end with the word "calculator" at the front. So if any IT taipans wana converge a dictionary with a calculator can anyone guess what they'll use if the word "wordical" gets adopted by Merriam-Webster?)

3] Updated the Band Superfriends blog - simply to spite cute 'lil Sue cause she's not there when they were photographing. Sakat-menyakat is a wonderful thing.

So go check 'em out...

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Seen good movies lately?

I saw Children of Heaven last night - yeah, yeah, I know this is quite a popular artsy movie and I'm a bit ketinggalan in that sense. Bawled out I did, as I saw certain scenes - kesian siot bebudak tu. But I do admire their sensitivity towards their parent's struggle to make ends meet.

I don't know whether I was that bright enough when I was younger, to realize that my parents too had to struggle to provide food on the table, education etc. for my siblings and me. On top of that my ailing grandma was living with us.

My younger cousins - the so called Coffee Beans generation - is a total contrast from Ali and Zahra of Children of Heaven. If Ali told Zahra not to tell their parents about the lost shoes, it is because he knows they both will get trashing from the father, whom he knows has no money to replace it either.

On the other hand, once I heard my uncle complained to my mom that his daughter simply said, "Ala Bah, ice blended kat Coffee Beans RM10 je, bukannya mahal!" and that nearly gave him a surge of high blood pressure.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Girls, you gota get out there!

"If you want to beat boys in cyber games, you can," says the sole female player among the 700 participants from 67 countries in the World Cyber Games Finals in Singapore. She is 24, studying to become an elementary school teacher and has a cleavege. Haiya, manyak susah to photograph one..

Monday, November 07, 2005

Days of dissing dishes

The older your parents get, the more visitors they get. Come Raya time this fact will hit you at full speed, and all you can do is grab some Sunlight and a sponge, and get things started at the kitchen sink.

Of course prior to that there will be all the cleaning and rubbing and mopping and arranging you'll have to do. And as the guests arrive there will be a lot of bancuh airs and hidang kuehs on the way.

Before you could join the crowd for some socializing more guests will arrive, and you're back at step two. That of bancuh airs and hidang kuehs, of course.

Some guests with a tad of kidney failure and slight case high-blood pressure tend to ask for air suam, so there'll be that to take care of too. Young at heart and strong in spirit, that's what they are. Most likely your parent's schoolmate back in Sungai Sumun in 1949.

Kids without fail will be part of the new demographic brought by the guests. Screaming, laughing, running, kencing, TV-remote-control stealing kids. Adorable, pinchable creatures, that's what they are.

And parents with standard control measures: "Aidil boy, mama said put-that-down! Now!" or "Fitri..! Fitri! Muhammad Fitri Afifi Haziq Ziryab bin Muhammad Iqbal! Stop it!" Unimpressive hardworking matadors, that's what they are.

Then there's you - the one with the pair of hands and a pair of legs and some brain cells behind the eye sockets. Yes, you, the one capable of making changes in the domestic plane:

The you who brings out the ketupats and lemangs and clean up the crumbs when all guests left.

The you who juggles the glasses and plates and make two litres of air sirap under ten seconds. (Some say 9.98 seconds, but who's timing?)

The you who knows where the rest of the semperit and London Almonds were hiding.

The you who managed to tidy up three separate parts of the house while making the air sirap for the next lot of guests.

And the you who did dishes, dissing and cursing as they slip and crack.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Bila larut malam

... try not to watch The Exorcism of Emily Rose...

For me it's quite scary! The contortions on her face! The eyes! The scream! The curse! Waaaa!!! Terbayang-bayang siot!

I caught it on big screen pulak tu! What to do, kerja maa...

"One two three four five six!"

Ish... seram...!

Friday, October 07, 2005

Thrills and chills

"Maya Karin is now Malaysia's Dian Sastro... yep... winnin' here and there... But she seems to be called the specialist when it comes to horrors ekk.." - So says one of the high-profile film critic in the coop I'm stuck in.

The comment came out right after he saw Maya's photo on the front page of today's Malay Mail, right next to the headline that reads, "Porn Queen busted". (The smaller print that carried Maya's story which goes, "Meet the vampire queen" was obviously a proof that the sub-editors responsible for the frontpage have no qualms about using the same word twice on the same page. Hmm...)

An akak critic comes in and argued, "Eleh Maya won the first award cause Jins said very few actress don't mind having her face dihodohkan on screen... Come on la! The second one I bet may not be as interesting... Sequels usually suck!"

I played peacemaker and said, "OK juga Maya tu berlakon... But I prefer Nasha Aziz's performance in Trauma anytime man. Damn scary one..."

Our other colleague from a far corner of the room interjected, "You know what's scary? You wanna know what's really scary?"

We all turned and looked at him expectantly...

"What's scary is Wan Maimunah man! Wan Maimunah I tell you... Any telemovie, any serial drama! Brr..!"

Wha..? Huh? Sampai sekarang kitorang tak paham siott...

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Selamat selamat

Selamat Berpuasa to all my Muslim friends.

Here's to Ramadan Resolution!

I shall go easy on the kuehs.

I shall bring only RM10 saje everytime I go to Pasar Ramadan.

I shall buka puasa with my family more than just a couple of times (yep, last year's hectic).

I shan't binge during sahur (I promise I'll wake up for sahur).

I shan't kutuk the lagu rayas that is not up to my taste.

I shan't get involved with last-minute shopping at areas like Jalan TAR.

I shan't order Jam Tarts or London Almond again (will let my other siblings get em!).

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Happy malas-kerja-mau-tengok-DVD-pulak day

I nak tengok...


Neverending Story

Batteries Not Included


The Wedding Singer

The Truth About Cats and Dogs

The Mirror Has Two Faces



Bring It On

Pirates of the Caribbean

Two Weeks Notice

The Shawshank Redeption


City of God

Pulp Fiction

10 Things I Hate About You

Almost Famous

My Cousin Vinnie

Empire Records

Easter Parade

The Importance of Being Earnest

Strictly Ballroom


The Green Mile

Ever After

dan lagi... dan lagi... and then I'll work. How about that, Ed...?

Friday, September 16, 2005

More puke


Belum habis baca paper, I came across yet another write up that makes me wana puke. Again.

Apparently a reporter in Malay Mail went to this restaurant called Tsunami, located in Desa Sri Hartamas. Spearheaded by three chaps - owners Shariff Shah and Tunku Sham Tunku Mahmud and head chef Ahmady Putit.

(The article carried a photo of the three - damng, they looked so local to me. In fact, two out of three of them looks very Malay.)

Among the highlighted cuisine - marinated lamb meatballs sauteed in brandy sauce.

In fact, as writer Edy Daniel pointed out, the outlet also has an extensive selection wine.

The icing on the cake: The restaurant is planning something special for this coming Ramadan!

WTF (again)...! What's wrong with this picture? (I'm not that pious, but the scene of Asmidar calling Ali, "Ali setan, Ali bodoh, Ali gile, Ali babi..." kept repeating in my mind.)

For the sake of argument, maybe those chaps aren't Muslims. PAH! I bet they're not until it's Raya time...

Puke. Again.

Things that make you wanna puke

Here's a case that recently shocked my plates:

Excerpts from NST:
18-year-old Sixth Former student stabbed his 16-year-old Fifth Former girlfriend, killing the eight-month-old foetus in her womb. (Ayoyo!)

The girl became pregnant early this year but is thought not to have realised her condition for six months. Even her boyfriend and family members had been unaware. (Huh? OK....)

Anyway. The guy found out about it, had initially agreed to marry her but the couple had fights in between. The last fight ended in the stabbing tragedy.

Boy was arrested, girl survived - but baby died.

Now, today's newspaper reported that the guy's defence team had told off the press that the case is not murder. Yes, someone died, yes, the someone who is a foetus is fully formed and showed signs of life as it was moving about in the mother's stomach, but no, it is not murder - so they arguued.

They brought forward Section 316 of the Penal Code, which was specifically enacted to deal with situations in which unborn children die as a result of an attempt made upon the life of its mother.

If you read on you'll get the general idea - that the boy was trying to kill the girl, and failed, but as a consequence of his attempt, the baby became a casualty.


Then WTF did he aimed the knife right at her belly then? If he wanted to kill her why not stab her heart or slit her throat right at the pulse line?

I remember a medical expert telling me that a stab wound in the abdomen is among the slowest way one could die, if pressure is applied to stop further bleeding. (For the record I was asked which kind of cancer kills the fastest - English 111 research paper assignment).

So what else would he be aiming for? Isn't the baby the cause of their misery? Isn't it typical for a mad man to blame the innocent for his predicament?


Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Think IKEA, and push it a notch higher

Yep, ladies and gentlemen, that's what Finland's all about. Among the things one'd noticed during the first 12 hours in the country are:

1) Finns are helpful and cheery lot, save for the immigration officers. However, if you have a press ID or a Nokia employee tag, you'll get the stamp quicker.

2) People start their commute to work as soon as 6AM-ish. If you are on the highway it is OK to go fast on any of the three lanes - no much of hogging here.

3) Dog owners are many, and most of them have twin K9s.

4) From furniture to utensils to toiletry box, everything looks so simple yet astoundingly elegant, making all the stuff in IKEA look like rejects.

5) Local brand chocolate, Fazer - damn sedap man!

Monday, September 05, 2005

Bangkok airport has cute buggies

If you are travelling to Bangkok with friends who have problems with long distance walking, don't worry, cause Bangkok airport has this cute buggies - you know the kind like they have in golf clubs, only bigger - 4 seats plus luggage bunk at the back.

No, I didn't get to ride on one. Was trying to ditch some fat while I'm at it, of course.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Espoo hoohoo!

When I say "hoohoo", I had more of a "boo hoo hoo" in mind, and a bit of "yoo hoo hoo".

After a lot of searching, it seems as if Espoo would be terribly cold (for most tropicanites anyway) around this time of the year, and most of their fests are over (e.g. Cinefest, Music Fest)... So that's boo hoo hoo.

The yoo hoo hoo part was due to the fact that yesterday, I managed to score a lovely winter jacket at 50% discount, making the RM179.00 good down to RM89.50, and to think I had budgeted RM250 to RM300 for it! So yoo hoo hoo for that!

The most important part is that there will be a chance for me to do what's expected, smoothly. Wish moi luck!

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Selamat Hari Merdeka

Fourty-eight years of independence. Tomorrow will be the day, tonight there'll be the fireworks, the crowd, the massive, massive, massive jam.

I'll be staying home with my lovely little flag. Be wavin' it at the stroke of midnight, watching the boom from the little balcony at the back.

Azam kemerdekaan saya ialah to be free of my own tantrums. Selamat Hari Merdeka to all, keep us there, right!

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

About Salmonella... But not the girl in AH-HA Season 1

You know there was a girl named Salmonella in AH-HA Season 1? She's the centre of the soap opera which has voice over jobs that sealed Oshin's coffin...

But there's another Salmonella out there, and this one's more deadly that the one mentioned above. This Salmonella is Salmonella Typhi, the bacteria that causes Typhoid fever...

You could get this gastrointestinal disease if you're not careful with what you eat. As a thumb rule, websites like and recommends that you boil it, peel it, cook it or forget it.

Or else, you'll get these stuff in your food, water, stomach, and eventually, your stool/feces... Scroll down...

Anyway, I happen to know that most licenced food stalls owners have been enforced to get TY2 vaccination shots (costs RM20 per needle) which ensures that they are no longer Salmonella Typhi carriers... (FYI Salmonella Typhi lives only in human bodies, some who recovered from the Typhoid fever may continue to carry the bacteria..)

p/s: pix borrowed from Yahoo! Search Pages. Thanks.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

And 45 minuts ago it was declared...

Today will always be a memorable one...

Air pollution index soars to hazardous levels; Malaysia declares emergency

Malaysia declared a state of emergency today as the air pollution index soared to extremely hazardous levels on the west coast, which is worst-hit by smoke from fires in Sumatra, an official said.

"We are now in a state of emergency," a National Security Council official said after the environment department said the index had reached 529 in the shipping centre of Port Klang and 531 in the coastal town of Kuala Selangor.

The government said on Wednesday that levels above 500 would trigger a state of emergency.

The National Security Council official said that although only the two west coast locations had exceeded 500, the emergency measures would extend to the whole of the Klang valley in which the capital Kuala Lumpur sits.

They will include closing schools, advising citizens to stay indoors or wear masks outside, and beginning rain-seeding in an effort to wash away the dust and smoke in the air.

In Kuala Lumpur the pollution index reached 321 and the city was shrouded in a yellowish mist that made the tops of buildings disappear. In the administrative capital of Putrajaya, which lies further towards the coast, the index reached 364.


Geylang, si paku geylang

Pulang marilah pulang, marilah pulang, bersama-sama...

Apparently there has been a burning occurence in Batang Kali, Selangor, earlier today - hence the smell of smoke on your clothes today, folks.

Yep, haze is at its worst today here in Klang Valley, Negeri Sembilan and parts of Perak due to the above reason, plus what we've been having for the past few days.

It started with the fire that happened in Putrajaya, and with fires in Sumatra and now Batang Kali, today as the API index breached 500 points, Selangor has declared state of emergency...

Jom le balik!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Reasons to watch Malaysian Idol 2

What reasons?!

Azam's gone! :(

Atilia's gone. :(

Faizull in :P

Fauzi out :(

Lisa out :(

If you like Faizull then he's worth tuning in I guess, cause save him the Malaysian Idol 2 is truly barren of supervoices... Hopefully Azam'll get a recording contract - or at least come back with a single. If Fauzi or Lisa gets to cut a single bet they'll be worth buying too.

Monday, August 01, 2005

The silliest line I've ever heard...

... came from a lady landlord I happened to bump into last Saturday. She was angry at her tenant, and outbursted a comment that went exactly like this:

"You can't talk to me like that! I'm an engineer you know!"

... to her tenant who earlier to that said, "I paid a month of deposit, surely you can't expect me to pay for three when I only needed to pay for two - that's easy maths, surely you can count?".

And what could we - my mom, my sis, and my poor ticklish soul - could do but slam a few guffaws straight into her ears.

Even earlier to that, the lady landlord was trying to screw the tenant by asking for extra payment, eventhough she well know that the tenant has placed a month's deposit before moving in 5 years ago, paid to her dad.

I'm sure not all engineers are as sensitive as that when someone happens to question his or her math prowess (I happen to know some really cool engineers who constantly make fun of themselves for not being able to count the percentage of increase of oil prices for the past two months).

Still, it was the most hilarious thing I've ever heard so far... minus that one involving a minister who owns like a hundred and eighty-nine open APs... now that one deserves to be documented on film.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Prank caller update

Apparently three girlfriends of mine received those calls too. Yep same number, same sorry pathetic loser.

And the wanker called me and Nadya on Tuesday morning. We both decided to press the pick up button then left our handphones by the side, and moved on with whatever we were doing (me sleeping, Nadya the nightbird watched the rest of the DVD).

Do I wanna trash the wanker? Naah... I do wana make him pay though. Time to see the IT guy again...

Obviously: The trash bin...

Monday, July 25, 2005

Relocated booboo

This is something I posted at another blog I maintain (dated then and there July 19, 2005), and the relocation is due to the fact that the story no longer fits in its original context, but never should it be wasted.

Blah and go
By Siti Rosman

KUALA LUMPUR, Tue. - A twenty-something youth commited breach of contract by leaving his workplace with a hollar of "Blahlah!" to his colleagues plus an SMS note saying "I quit!" sent to his superior yesterday. According to senior colleagues, this markes his third time big screw-up on the job, but this time there were no trace of guilt, remorse nor repentence of any sort.

"What makes the matter so weird is that no one in the group really knows why he is really upset," said one senior colleague. "He simply refused to come back to the main line to perform his duty, and even signalled somewhat insolently to another senior colleague who had beckoned him to come back."

A few other senior colleagues suspected that he might have been too embarassed and disraught over his very last outing on the line, in which he had forgotten his lines, delivered what he could muster in out-of-tune manner and fumbled to the end.

"Everyone makes mistakes, but with experience you will know how to handle it. Perhaps the venue of the operation, which was packed with people made him even more upset, having embarassed himself in front of what he though was too big of a crowd. He ain't seen the real crowd yet!" gushed another senior colleague, who relayed the experience of working in a hall packed with way too many people so much so that going to the loo became almost an impossible feat.

When asked by Bandsuperfriendsblog if the possible permanent loss of team mate will affect the group badly, a spokesperson for the group optimistically said, "Indeed when there is a breach of contract by individuals who are not professional nor are they respectful of others, the group is affected. However this has happened before, and it had not stopped the group from delivering their best. We're confident there are lots more capable performers out there who will fill in his shoes."

Last in, first out: Quitter who said, "Blahlah!" and unabashedly left.

"Breach of contract is a legal concept in which a binding agreement or bargained-for exchange is not honored by one of the parties to the contract by non-performance or interference with the other party's performance." -

In some cases contract quitter may not be granted payment for any previous service rendered, unless his/her superior is willing to be generous.

Another frontline colleague of the nincompoop youth even went as far as saying, "Actually, when he was roped in, there wasn't a lot of change. I still carry the same load. So if he really wants to quit, it doesn't bother me."

Another senior colleague who had had old-school training on the job commented that new recruits should be trained as how it was done in the old days, when freshmen gets a variety of scolding and spanking until they became proficient.

His comment was supported by the founding member of the group, who observed that recruits of today are generally lembik and tend to quickly naik lemak when given some slack.


* For the record the guy has returned to his team after two days of feeling sorry for himself. Capital L...r...

Tuesday, July 19, 2005


Halamak... STOMP nak mai la... Bakpe gok maha dok'oh tiketnye?

Why oh why are the shows in Istana Budaya always so expensive? I'm not just talking about Cats and STOMP now, even Alang Rentak Seribu or National Symphony Orchestra performances cost quite a bundle for an average Malaysian like me.

And they wonder why it is so hard to promote these shows.

And they wonder why art appreciation is lacking among Malaysians.

And they wonder why they're being accused of being clique-ish.

Why won't they reserve more places for students? Why won't they give more early bird discounts? Why won't they give cheaper options?

You'd think students nowadays could afford RM77 for a seat? Even working individuals like me would think thrice (to the power of two) to pop RM77, let alone RM127 per show - and that's minimum prices!.

Sure, STOMP (etc.) is a recognised, international outfit. However, surely there must be a way to make these acts more accessible to normal people like me.


However, if you are lucky enough to be among the minority of people who would not think twice paying more than RM50 per show, perhaps the JPEG I borrowed from would be worth perusing...

Friday, July 15, 2005


Ordered the Double-Cheese, felt a bit guilty.
Got the Light Coke that just doesn't hit.
Soggy fries complements but tasteless without chilli.
The saviour is Apple Pie minus the heat.

p/s: This is a mild, almost mis-manifestation of my ketidak-puasan hati kerna McDelivery during lunch tadi agak lambat dan mamat yang deliver tu tumpahkan air kitorang, pastu tanak bertanggungjawab lak tu! Dah la fries ku yang berpeluh-peluh tu tak cukup chilli sauce. Marah la ni.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Did I say beach? Well, I meant...

... sea. Deep sea. Deep enough for novice South China Sea.

Plus thunder and lightning. Whichever comes firstlah. I was too terrified and excited to notice.

Plus high waves. Plus rocking boat. Big boat with parangs and other dangerous utensils lying around...

Plus a trio of seamen who said, "Going to sea while the rain is a-rocking and a storm is a-brewing? Why not? Then we can take a shower AND go fishin' at the same time - cool huh!" (OK for the record the neither pakcik nor the abangs used the word "cool" but in essence, that's what they said... or something to that effect. Remember? I was terrified and stuff...?)

And I never did find my sea legs. And I lost my orientation (meaning I could not recall which way was the mainland once we lost sight of it, hence that sinking feeling that says if the boat capsizes and I'm thrown into the ocean, I would not know which way to swim to).

Yet there we were, two boats full of top executives attached to a billion dollar company and a bunch of IT journalists, sailing right into the middle of the spot where fishermen always go when it is squid season.

We were already partly wet the moment we got onto the boat, and the dark cloudy sky finally delivered the shower it's been meaning to bestow...

In simpler terms, after five minutes struggling to get on the boat, most of us were wet waist below with saltwater, and after another five minutes, we got the needed cleansing.

After braving a 20 minutes wild ride on the open sea, we finally anchored at a place where squids were OK with being caught without a bait.

And some actually did fell for it!

See, to candat sotong we were given a roll of nilon thread with a rod of hooks attached to it. Then we're supposed to drop it all the way down, then tug it every now and then so that passing squids will get entangled by surprise and in the end, earn the name "My catch".

The pakcik onboard said you'll feel the hook gets a bit heavier - that's how you'll know that your hook has gotten a catch. In fact as the rain subsided and we were given the roll of nilon thread, he confidently asked some of the girls onboard to tanak nasi...

Then after some time of throwing and tugging, and complaining about the possible development of uneven biceps, and wondering about how the other boat was doing (see we were separated to two spots about 100 metres away from the other)... one journalist finally, nonchalantly, indifferently, hooked a squid up.

Yours truly got so much more excited than her. After all she is one of those shy types, so if I was jumping and squeling rocking the boat then I must be exponentially happy, no?

But not long after that another reporter caught one, then another, then I did (acted cool to cover up my previous joyous outburst over someone else's catch), then another lady reporter caught a big ebek fish (This guy *barks! Literally! I mean the fish did! Did bark I mean. Really!), then more squids came up!

We went on tugging for about another hour, told bad jokes, a guy barfed, watched the sunset then finally went back to shore...

We all had to jump back into the water to get off the boat - most went straight to their rooms in order to get cleaned and dressed for the BBQ after thanking the nice boatmen, but some of us (three of us actually) stayed in the warm, calm sea water, happily paddling and ignored the call backs to the beach.

The beach was nicely lit with spotlights from the adjacent garden, so we could see how clear the water was. I was staring at my feet swishing the sand below with water at shoulder level... Then it struck me...

... that my Petaling Street watch is still strapped on my wrist, and it's still tickin'! Considering I spent RM10 on it... what a steal huh?!

* I highly suspects that the fish knew we were calling him The Fish with a Suicide Mission, and begs to differ! But seriously. To be caught without even a small worm of a bait.. C'mon...

Monday, July 04, 2005

And another beach assignment...

... this time to Terengganu! Tho I rilly rilly wish that I could be in Sarawak, enjoying the Rainforest Music Festival... And to think I've heard quite a good bit of Petrona Martinez! Nevermind, times are hard and I can't afford the trip this time, no? Wish some people would just pay and let me live for a change... Anyway Krakatoa isn't there again...

Anyway, Terengganu. Yes, it should be fun - treasure hunt la, pampering la, or so the PR lady said... be "keepin my fingers cross" anyway... any IT reporter would shiver if I mention the PR coop's namey...

Hopefully things will be much better than my previous beach/island work outing (Penang... MAS domestic sux!).

This time around, the guys working under the mightily rich fella who just donated BILLIONS to Live 8 will be driving us there, right to the beach!

Among others scheduled, besides the work thingla, is ze barbarical marine animal skodeng-ing and hunting and killing and eating spree... Promise, I shall not consume any endangered species. Wish-a-me a-fun!

(Please note that the pix's borrowed from

Thursday, June 30, 2005

What to do when you receive prank calls

1. Keep the number in your phonebook, so that you can call your telco and have the number barred.

2. If the calls persists or maybe the fella change his number everytime, just pick it up, leave your handphone where you can see it or just resume sleeping - make the caller pay (a lot) by not hanging up till he's all wisen up.

3. Get an extremely loud whistle, pick it up and give the loudest "feewit!" you can muster.

4. Entertain you friends by putting the call on speakerphone.

5. Pass the number to all the insurance agents/telemarketers/multi-level marketing downlines/get-rich-quick scheme conmen you know.

6. Sign the number up at!

Monday, June 27, 2005

The prepaid insecurities

Due to an unfortunate circumstance, I was forced to use the free prepaid pack that recently got during a telco assignment. No guessing that moi, a postpaid user for the past 8 years (yep, held the same number since 5 years ago), found it the very difficult to adjust.

Once during this terrible chapter I was on a bus and having only RM0.26 sen in my prepaid account. The anxiety of it! Accounts from the Suzaili* case started popping from the back of my mind - what if I fell into the same situation, alone and the bus driver turns whacked?

So I skipped buses and stick to LRT. Another time during the same terrible chapter I remembered having only RM0.11 sen left by the time I replied a couple of SMSes. And the discomfort of it all! I had to be careful with my credit, and ended up ignoring several friendly SMS from some friends (looks like I'll have less friends now, and I already have few to begin with).

With RM0.11 sen credit, I walked from the LRT station towards home, walking fast, hoping not to be caught by any kind of danger or encounter one in action (like I did several months ago) or any situation that requires calling the cops.

Why did I switch, thou may ask. Well for the record, it wasn't as if I had a choice. I never liked the prepaid arrangement - though it might work for most people, it just doesn't cut it for me.

I'd love the freedom to call and hang on for as long as I like. I love sending SMSes to people that deserves cheering. I love replying SMSes from my family and friends and know that there's no limit to mind.

But with certain setbacks that took place (beginning several months ago, in fact, partly my fault) I had to sort of part with my favourite number and make use of the door gift prepaid pack temporarily. Not that I wanted to, I had no choice.

These certain setbacks originates from one source. It was like a leaking pipe that I had to keep a thumb on to make sure no more water is wasted. Never did the pipe said thanks for the trouble, thanks for keeping it running for the past months - and I had my thumb sealing the leak since last October... so imagine when you had to keep the leak covered, you can't do much else, no?

* Remember the engineer Suzaili who was raped by a bus driver, then killed and ditched into a bush, and onlookers tried to chase the speeding bus, and she was banging the windows as the bus sped...

Monday, June 20, 2005

Hey! Take that back! Take that back!

Proton soooo cut my line one! I tell you, I wonder whoever came up with the new Proton model name has got to be... be... something!

Why Savvy? Why? Why?

It is my idea to put Johnny Depp on a throne first! That's why I had submitted the tagline "Mature and savvy" to go with the newspaper's new look. Savvy chosen in honour of Depp, savvy? (But of course, given the so-not-prestigious (OK, many people thought it was ugly) looking masthead we recently acquired, the tagline may not suit all that well, but... Who cares? If I win I get some cash!)

Now that Proton's got it all pasted on their latest model, just like those ugly stickers that they love so much to stick on the doors of every Proton and the internal tagline contest winner hasn't been announced yet, what's to happen to my darjeeling Depp?

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Tis the season to be..

... shopping!

I mean, when a couple of cousins on my Dad's side are getting married (one this weekend and the other soon to follow) and another one (Mom's side) getting engaged (next weekend), who wouldn't need a little bit of indulgence right?

I mean, those people settling down need to be gift-ed (so must go shopping) and to present them the gifts, the gifter must be gifted too, right? (so must go shopping again). So two trips to the mall today before I got to work is hardly surprising, yes?

Not that I got in to the coop that late - twas only twenty minutes after two. But for the record let me tell you that my cordial, well-meaning intentions to get my butt seated to before my desk came way, way earlier.

The thought that counts, remember? I mean, who needs to know that the thoughts crossed my mind right in between the electrical impulses in my brain that said the T'Z jeans I was looking at is not really my kind of blue, right?

Thursday, May 19, 2005

One of my favourites...

I've been reduced to being shutterbug status eversince the advent of cameraphones. Of the many I have reviewed, one of the best I've came across is the Smartphone from O2 - O2 Xphone.

This is one of my favourite shots taken with the review unit I got:

Fisherman Alfonso

The guy in the photo is my Abang Ngah, the venue is.. I forgot. I think it is one of the watered areas of Kampung Pisang, somewhere in Perak (about an hour's drive from Ipoh).

He's being trained to use the net by my Dad, and this is one of his best effort during practice. Did he catch any fish? Actually, no - maybe he was making too much noise with his feet or something like that.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Flea market plan

I got lots of stuff I don't need. Feel like renting a booth at Amcorp Mall next month and sell them off cheap, real cheap.

Anyone wanna join? Ariel? Nads? Got anything to sell el-cheapo? I haven't check out the rates yet at Amcorp, but I heard a booth at South City Plaza costs only RM10 per day.

And maybe tis safer to go there (since some of what I'm selling are door gifts stuff - too much calculators already... cannot simpan lah), more discreet.

Maybe I'll call my booth Sen Corner or something like that.

The girl who doesn't know she's an asshole

Note that this is a follow up entry on the previous, "How rude!".

Note that I'll be doing more bashing on the anal exec, the one I've branded "Analaine".

The thing is, last Friday, during the event, Analaine continued to pissed me off by:
1] Not heeding my request of having top guns from both signing parties to pose together. (Hello! Where got one party signing with each other!)

2] When asked why, she said her side paid for the event so there's no need to highlight the other party. She also added, "Biasalah, PR kan..." (What an insult to real PR specialists who really do deliver for their clients and media.)

3] When introduced to the top guns on her side, she would not let me get some comments from them for the article I'm currently working on. (I just started chatting with them, and she literally dragged me away from them.)

4] When I insisted that I just want general comments, she said why not not send the questions to her and she'll make sure it's delivered to the right person and she'll make sure to send me back the feedback. (Fine!)

So early Monday, I shot her an email and requested that she get me the feedback. Today...


Why the fuck didn't she just let me get some input immediately while I was there, at the event, with the right person in good mood? It was just simple comments for heaven's sake! Malang betul la jumpa perempuan Analaine ni!

My boiling blood propelled me to spread the word around the office - "telco PR specialist, Analaine, avoid at all cost!" Menyirap siot!

With steam coming out of my ears I began to call her all sorts of name in hope to calm myself. (Here are some favourites: Perempuan malas, bodoh gile, 666, setan and finally, da Chucky's Seed.)

After lunch I was OK - finally got the thing out of my system. Phew!

Friday, May 06, 2005

"How rude!"

I called up this telco to inquire about an event they're organising this eve. And one of my questions was, "I just found out about this, so since I did not bring my own cam and have only the office's which I'm not used to, do you have your own photographer?"

The answer was, "Ugh, gee, I dunno, maybe we do, maybe we don't. I suggest you start practising using the office cam."

What tha fuck? What kind of answer is that? Coming from an exec tu!

I did not let the US-accented comment slide, of course. I told her that if they don't have a photographer then there's no back-up. So if my photos did not turn out right then...

(What I really wanted to say was, "Hello makcik US-mali, I got lots of other things to do besides 'practising' using the old cam for the sake of your bloody event tau! Nak datang at last minute ni pun dah kira baik!")

"Er, maybe we do have a photographer. I guess we do..." she quickly retorted before I could change my mind about the comeback.

Again, what tha fuck? So now you do? Please!

I also asked who's the VIP for the event. When she said no VIPs, except for maybe their CFO/COO or some guy, boy oh boy was I tempted to just stood her up or what!

But I guess I'm going... Work is work ma, even if you have to face anal personalities (let's just call her Analaine from now on) like this one.

Anyways, my teammate told me that Analaine was his junior back in UKM. And that "dia tu memang perasan sikit."

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Dewa turun ke bumi?

Angeless, who just got a job at the building opposite my coop emailed, "wei...dewa bikin konser 28 may, kl tower, 8.30mlm. happening ni...happening... "

pix borrowed from, thanks!

Boleh caya ke ni? Anyone got any news about this? Bob? Nads?

So far a tour on the group's site did not give any kabar to confirm this. Have to wait and see...

Tribute to Fat (and yes, I do mean the mass)

Spelled using the letters F, A and T, fat is a word many despise, often thought as a disease, many a times a cause for controversy. Tis a state for the unwise, related to subjective measurement, linked to clothes sizes.

In my quest to stay healthy, I bumped into this article while surfing and I wish to paste it here in my blog... simply because.

Fat is Not All Bad!
by Anton Maartens

Body fat is not necessarily the ‘big bad enemy’ the fitness, beauty and weight loss industries will sometimes have us believe.

Yes, too much body fat is no doubt a serious health risk and can be very damaging to your well-being and quality of life.

Some of the health risks of having too much body fat include increased blood pressure, high cholesterol, cardiac problems, diabetes, varicose veins, cancer and an increased susceptibility to infections.

But that does not mean that body fat in itself is bad! Essential body fat is a very important source of energy for normal bodily functions and especially vital in maintaining the health of your heart and your immune system.

A healthy body composition is one of the crucial components of your overall health and fitness. Having too little body fat can be just as bad for your health as being overweight!

It is therefore important to rather focus your exercise and weight loss efforts on achieving 'leanness', and not ‘thinness’ (the way it is often promoted in beauty and fashion magazines).

The amount of body fat that you need to stay healthy is at least 8 - 15% for women and 5 - 8% for men.

However, body fat recommendations for top athletes often tend to be lower than the levels normally prescribed for the general population, because it is believed that too much body fat may hinder the athlete’s performance.

A person’s body composition is usually divided into lean body weight and fat weight. Your fat weight is then expressed as a percentage of your total body weight by using this formula:

body fat percentage = (fat weight ÷ total body weight) x 100

Experts disagree on how much body fat is too much, but the following general guidelines are a reasonable estimate:

Obese: More than 33% for women and more than 26% for men

Overweight: Between 28% and 33% for women and between 21% and 26%

Acceptable: Between 17% and 28% for women and between 12% and 21% for men

Lean: Less than 17% for women and less than 12% for men

Underweight: Less than 8% for women and 5% for men

There you go. See, not all fat is bad.

p/s: Note that this article, is pasted here paramountly is for my personal collection only (read: my personal knowledge enrichment program). Takde kena mengena dengan yang hidup atau yang telah pergi atau yang terasa ada kena mengena dengan hal ini. Thank you.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Marooning who?

Someone wrote to NST this morning with one of the best suggestions I've heard in years! The writer, V.R.K. said he wished to take a step further and innovate the idea put forward by the Mufti of Perak (he suggested that people with HIV should be isolated on an island), which in turn was churned out in the wake of a worthwhile suggestion from one of the MPs (that drug addicts should be sent to an islands and be given free drugs so that they'll end up all corpse).

In his letter titled "Let's maroon our problem people" he suggested that traffic offenders, litterbugs and people found guilty of corruption should be sentenced to an island with no roads or vehicles, an island full of rubbish and an island where there is no money, respectively.

Now how about that!

I also wish to jump on this "Novel solutions" bandwagon and suggest that people who spit in public and on public property too be sentenced to live with their own kind on an island. Make that a very, very small island and with no shoes supplied so that everywhere they step, their feet will go shweck, shweck, shweck!

Friday, April 29, 2005

Those ads are calling me...

Flick through today's NST, Berita Harian, Malay Mail and Harian Metro and you'll see there's lots of attractive ads - no, I'm not talking about the colourful DiGi or Motorola ads, though those are good to peruse.

Check out the Habib Diamond Extravaganza ad... Those nicely designed jewelry at unbelievable price - wish I have enough to buy a pair of earrings for my mom!

And the C.Mammoth, Redhot and other furniture ads - man, I'm dying to get myself a sofa or sofabed! Especially when there's so much going on on the telly nowadays.

And the Kawanku and other electrical stores ads - a washing machine at RM99! And hairdryers at less than RM10! When it is the seasons your peers and cousins get married, tis time to check these ads out to get some gift ideas!

Speaking of which I've been missing a couple of weddings already due to work - yes nowadays sometimes I work during weekends. Let me also note here that I sometimes don't work on weekdays. So all's fair in the publication realm.

Another friend's getting married on Labours' Day. From her brief explanation it seemed like the wedding is a family arrangement kinda thing. Isn't that sweet.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

How far can you go?

Just a posting to test wether flickr is better than fotopages... Have tried the latter but nowadays the pix doesn't come out on this site as consistently as I'd like em to be. So now trying flickr, to see if it's better.

Just a couple of photos for this "pilot project".. See how it goes...

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Still life on canvas

Why do some people paint apples and grapes placed in a bowl next to the vase of sunflowers? Why do some people paint old bicycle with petai and rambutans on the gelegar?

Kenapa some employees stare at their CRT screens as if Sex on the City is on? Kenapa some employees type away on their keyboard as if she's writing a Dear John letter?

OK OK, I'm bored, and that's official. In the most literal manner.

Wish I could have Frampton Nuttel come and visit me so that I can play the Bertie trick on him. Wish Roald Dahl would take me in his car and the Fingersmith would let me see how he pinched the writer's shoelaces off his pedal-pushing feet.

Wish I was there on the beach when Woodsworth's eye caught a glimpse of the dancing daffodils. Wish I was Den Wahab's assistant so that I can help him sew on some sequins.

I'm bored. Someone please ask me out for tea!

Monday, April 04, 2005

Writer's block! Pathetic, really...

How many times have I been to this corner of my mind? The corner that says "Yer havin writer's block and yer not doin anythin about it". The corner that says "Go ahead, go and layanlah your pathetic lazyness, see if that works".

And what did I do after realizing that I'm giving in to my habit of procrastinating? I went and signed up for a CPR course, yep, yep, that's what I did. Ah hah.

In retrospect, I could deduce my rash action as a sub-concious reaction to my current condition - and CPR specifically is a symbolism of my inner being trying to get out of my lousy predicament.

Which means, when I signed up for CPR - you know, the course in which people learn how to give first phase rescue treatment for the injured in cases of emergencies - the person I was really trying to save is myself. My self that's dying in the lake of whine, drowned in the sea of laze and blinded by clouds of despair.

Yeah, I could say that. Sounds appropriate, sounds logical, sounds analytical in fact. Sounds as if I've been doing some serious thinking.

But I won't. I won't give any excuse for my behaving so irresponsibly. I shall own up.

I am currently feeling extremely takde mood to write any travel piece story, and I signed up for the CPR course cause I'll get a sijil afterwards (though I don't collect sijils as a hobby, it'll be proof of me exploiting my time with the coop productively).

Abis cerita.

Friday, April 01, 2005

The training, the earthquake and Monkey Business

So I went for this "Development of Professional Image" training right. And managed to pick up a thing or two (more than that actually) that I could use in my daily routine.

Among the discoveries:
1] Grooming: Don't have expensive clothes? Don't sweat it (literally), can still concentrate in maintaining cleanliness and tidyness till the next fat bonus (if there's any uwaa...) + sales carnival arrives.

2] Dining: Knives and spoons on your right, forks on your left - work your way outside in. Wrist on the table alright, forearms not quite, elbows no-no.

3] Speaking: No swearing, no tasteless jokes, no politics, no religion, no personal (age, weight, income).

But what I don't want to do is use make-up. Setakat powder and lip-gloss I can tolerate. Free mascara also can lah from time to time. But full-fledge foundation, lipstick, eye-shadow, blusher, eyeliner... alamak... berat la. Costly on top of that!

Nevermind, you concentrate on what you can and want to do, the ones you cannot don't give up on it yet, give it some more time. Now that's what I've summarized from the training. (Bet the trainer won't agree, but I'll let her do that.)

And so I was in a parked car, in front of McD's drive-through in Setiawangsa right, when the earthquake happened. Tremor I felt, but seated I remained in the car, and confused I did become. (I don't understand why so many people thought they pening kepala, when the shaking definately feels external?)

At first - since I was left alone in the car while my cute date went to drop some speakers and stands belonging to his friend in the studio opposite before he sends me home - I thought "Mamat mana lak dok menempek bontot kat kereta orang ni? Kot iye pun jangan la henyak kuat-kuat mek oi.."

But when I turned and found no one messing around, not a single butt pressed to the Putra's bumper - I got a bit scared. When the tremors continued, stronger on top of that for a few seconds more, and I got scared even more.

If you've been to Pantai Timur via Karak highway, someone's bound to tell you about an urban legend aka highway ghost story which involves a man getting hauled onto his rosak car and bashed by a hideous-hairy-creature and the wife in the passenger seat could hear the thonking sound coming from above.

So don't blame me if I thought a ghastly werewolf had landed above the Putra I was in OK?

I quickly double-check if the car is locked. The tremor then became milder, and my date came back. Reflecting now I realized that everything happened within a very short span of time, really.

He asked me why I looked so "off-white". Ha ha. Told him that something scared me for a bit but I don't know what, and he said no worries cause he's back. Apparently he was too caught up in replying a client's SMS that he didn't noticed the ground was moving under his feet.

When I got home I flicked on 8TV on just to listen to songs while I kemas-kemas a bit before going to bed - that's when I found out that a 8+ earthquake had occurred. Then one of the chatters said there's a live news coverage on NTV7, so naturally I switched channel...

And I saw Monkey Business at Actor's Studio last night with BC and two architects - 5.5/10 - that's my rating. I especially like the second last piece. Maybe I'm more of a dialogue-matters kind of audience...

I also caught ASK dance student's final sem performance - twas good, the only slack was that some of their friends in the audience did not give them due respect - quite a spoiler when someone shout out a dancer's name then have the guy on stage twitch nervously when he is already a nervous wreck. But hey, you get all kinds of audience, so it's a good practice for them.

Friday, March 25, 2005

Movies I love...

Been watching foreign stuff lately - would like to humbly recommend a German film, Die Fetten Jahre sind vorbei (btw in Australia it was titled The Edukators).

I love the film cause it has an uber cool, super down-played ending, above a great plot and the many clever debates. But of course the actor Stipe Erceg (the guy left-most), who looked more like a couldn't-care-less-about-the-world rock star rather than a young man with world-changing idealism, with his oh-so-macho looks, helps!

I also saw a French love story - Jeux d'enfants (English title Love Me If You Dare but according to a guy born in Avignon it translates closer to "games children play" if his English's good enough) - which Bob was telling me about during one of our rare teh-tarik bump in CM, but I never expected to have the chance to watch for "free".

Tis hard not to fall in love with this movie, cause the love tale between Sophie and Julien spanned throughout their lifetime. And the games they play... Inspiring, horrifying... Let me just say if you and your significant other are both the competitive type, maybe you should not watch this film - it'll give you strange ideas! Anyway the movie definately thought me a thing or two about jodoh... iye... jodoh...

Have any of you watched good movies? Recommendations?

p/s: Photos and review links goes to and - thanks for lendin!

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Why can't girls have four BFs each?

Who says girls can't have four guys to call her own? Of course a girl can. The only problem is, in the end when a girl wants to go on her honeymoon, she can only bring one.

In this world where Faizal Hussein, Johnny Depp, Takeshi Sorimachi and BC are breathing the same air and looking at the same moon as I am, how can a girl choose?

As Malcolm in the Middle would argue, life is unfair..

Monday, March 21, 2005

An island in the tropical heat

Eversince a colleague was sent to Bali for a product launching assignment I've been eyeing for a island-trip-tropical-beach-all-exotic assignment too... and finally one landed on my lap today.

When you think of it as an assignment, a product launch in fact, it may not seem so exciting. However, place the event on an island, a tropical island, an island well known for good food - hey why not?

Penang, here I come!

Thursday, March 17, 2005

It does not always rain when a pig squeals

Yesterday my boss was enjoying a bunch of what is being called the new-age, modern Malay proverbs, involving classic sayings like "Kerbau dipegang pada talinya, manusia dipegang pada janjinya" was turned into "Lembu dipegang pada tali, manusia dipegang pada tangan."

And he goes, "Wargh wargh wargh, that's so funny!" - I winced inwardly. At times I could just let it pass as harmless fun, but at this point in life, when you finally understand certain things like legacy, identity and patriotism, I feel the pain of my dwindling heritage! Sorry, can't appreciate such jokes anymore.

I mean, I love it when people say, "Kecil tapak tangan, nyiru saya tadahkan" - the easiest way to show sincerity and willingness to take you in.

And I rather anyone drop hints like "Terima kasih daun keladi..." than hearing something as direct as, "Esok aku nak kau tolong aku lagi tau."

And to me "Pinggan tak retak, nasi tak dingin" is probably the most pedas yet subtle brush off. Though so, I can't help but note how close the Malay proverb is to the Malay lifestyle and daily routine, to nature and the nature of things.

If you check today's NST/Life & Times, you'll find a piece of American proverb on the cartoons page that goes, "It does not always rain when a pig squeals."

Ugh, how can that beat our very own "Dengar guruh di langit, air di tempayan dicurahkan" or even Ella and Deddy Dores' "Mendung tak bererti hujan..."

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Buying handphone? Don't deal with any Ah Beng resellers in Pertama Complex!

So many stories lately being told to me by friends who advised against going to Pertama Complex to buy handphones - "Don't go to Pertama, no matter how desperate you are," so they would say. The Ah Beng sellers there will sweet talk you, and you'll be cheated, tricked, swindled, deceived, conned, scammed, framed, shammed, shucked, and hustled mercilessly.

One friend said she bought a phone - didn't sign any form but left them her name on the warranty card, after all she already have a post-paid line - and suddenly about three weeks later she was notified by her telco that she had already agreed to sign up for a twelve months contract for a new corporate post-paid line. She had to go back to the same Ah Beng in Pertama, and when she could not find him, go to the telco's office to cancel her line, which costed her about RM150...

Another friend said he bought a handphone that was supposed to be new, but after a couple of days the set went bonkers - the speakers failed. He sent it for a check up and warranty claim, and found out that the warranty has expired for that particular set - yep, it was a second hand set that he bought - they just changed the housing, in fact he even found some messages in the Sent Items folder (stolen set!). Of course he tried to relocate the same Ah Beng and the same store from which he bought the phone, but both man and shop were gone...

A colleague also traded in his handphone and bought a set from an Ah Beng in Pertama. He went around all the shops, and found this one store selling the model he wanted for just RM20 lower than the rest of the store. The catch was, the charger was not included. And the charger costs about RM70...

But I had no choice but to go there recently - due to some dealings made by some people in my office with a certain phones distributor who has several shops there - and purchase one unit for the office.

And true enough - there were lots of conniving Ah Bengs there! One tried to sell me a second hand unit and I only found out after I checked the Sent Item folder (thank God I had heard my friend's story), and he also tried to sell me a unit sans the charger as well.

Another Ah Beng (at the same store, haiya, if only I could go to some respectable stores elsewhere and forget about the deal with the distributor!), when asked for a little discount simply wave me away called me crazy (lei kong meh ah, chi sin ah? pat chi so wai - hello, no use going to school in Ipoh and not learn how to cuss in Cantonese!). As if I don't know their competitors in Sg Wang sells it a bit cheaper (wish I could go there instead!)...

I gave up - called the guys at the office and said if they want the phone, just wait for the distributor to send one to us, no need to rush lah. If the review miss the mag's deadline, then so be it. And if due to that the distributor wishes to cancel advertising with us, take it as fated!

So to all reading my post - stay away from the Ah Beng phone resellers in Pertama! After all, pricing is similar if not cheaper in Sg Wang, and I bet the resellers there are more polite too.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Gatal rhymes with Chagal

And I only said that because the Chagal will always remind me of the gatal-gatal I got after I saw his early works in that nice village restaurant up on a hill. The hill we trekked up when the wind was blowing a chill lower than 2 degree Celcius which made my skin go dry and all itchy.

Chagal and Picasso of course. After all the same restaurant was where they hung out and had their work hanged as payment for their food during their early days. But Picasso doesn't rhyme with gatal, so Chagal it is.

Gatal- gatal, is that all I can tell you about my recent adventure? Well, not quite. Can also tell you that:

1] Cote de Azur literally means "blue coast".

2] Cezanne managed to sit for a year of law school before devoting himself to art.

3] Wearing Converse shoes is a Parissien thing to do.

4] They may say tap water in Nice is drinkable, but really dude, tis not.

5] Three types of wine are usually served with meals, white, red and rose, but some people will only get Evian all the time (like me!).

6] The Charles De Gaulle airport is 40 minutes and 8 Euro away from central Paris, and we thought KLIA was bad!

7] Most perfume sold by popular brands like Issey Miyake, Gio and Ralph Lauren were made in Grasse, a small French-Riviera town located 30 minutes from Cannes, where some 2,000 men and women work in perfume factories.

8] French guys are not all tall, some are just about my height (5'4).

9] On the streets of Paris, Cannes, Nice and Aix en Provence, you'll see more dogs than cat. In fact if you didn't see any cat for a week, that's normal. And unfortunately you'll likely be less trendy than these dogs too, unless you wear Converse.

10] The French way to pronounce the designer brand YSL is "Ee Si Loghr-ghront" while La Croix sounded something more like "La Quah".

11] And yep tis true. The French hated it if you speak English. You'll get wrong directions, bad service and cold looks, so say Bonjour! then feel free to speak Malay.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

When you're up to no good

pix snagged from

Have you ever felt sneaky? Devious, crooked even, and sub-rosa... (Ooh, I'm so not over the Da Vinci Code yet!)

If you haven't, try it. Trust me, the feeling is good.

In fact, it's rather exciting. Especially when you didn't mean to, but things just happen to turn like that and that's that.

Since that's that had smiled upon me, I had to resort to living up to my name's homophone. And when that happens, it means I'm mean.

And what's a day of sneakiness without being mean, and mean it? So up to 3PM today, I've committed three no-goods already!

And it feels sooo good. Being in a sneaky mood itself feels wonderful.

It feels like you've just been introduced as the journalist invited to do an interview, and the PR who will have to be at your beck and call, handling the event was once the senior busuk who gave you a lot of crap in U.

It feels like you've just "Ekhem!"-ed behind the backs of a bunch of "friends" (or so you thought) who were in the middle of badmouthing you.

It feels like you've just bumped into your ex-suitor and purposely called him "Comel sayang" right in front of his bitchy, insecure girlfriend.

I can't tell you what were the non-deeds that I've managed to accomplished today, hey, I don't want to be a bad example. But I'll tell you this - try it!

Thursday, January 20, 2005

The sound coming from...

* photo borrowed from, thanks!

... above!

You see my habitat is something many people would call:
1] my dad: "Pigeon hole!"
2] my 1st bro and sis-in-law (owners): "Well maintained, conveniently located."
3] my sis: "Kadang-kadang macam asrama ITM pulak."
4] me: "My lovely hole."

OK - tis actually a condo unit, located somewhere in the the earlier batus of Cheras. There's four of us renting there, and we are on Level 16.

The story I'm about to tell you came to exist simply because Level 16 is not the highest floor of the tower we live in. There is a... gasp! cheng, cheng, cheng... eeeiiikkk...! Level 17.

So we have neighbours above us. No big deal, right? Probably a couple, probably not married, probably night-birds - still, no big deal right?

The thing is... (all mysteries have things in it. Tis the things that make a mystery a mystery. If you already knew what the thing is all about then it would not be a mystery, right?)

OK, the thing is, we've been hearing weird noises, coming from right above.

Hey, what do you mean, "no big deal?!" Of course it is a big deal if you live in a it-all-boils-down-to-flats house and hears weird noises from above!

And here's the thing: The thing is, the noise starts only when it's after 11PM... and it gets worst when it is after 1AM...

What kind of noises, you asked?

Well, do you know how it sounds if you hear a big-ass, filled-to-bursting-point luggage fell off a bed on to the floor? Yep, that kind of thud!, that's what I'm talking about.

Sometimes the thud! gets louder, as if the luggage bag had multiplied three times larger and the bed had risen several feet higher. Yep, and these low, baritone thud!s happen at around 3AM, or 4AM...

All of us - on one night or another - had jumped off our bed, out of our deep, REM, beauty sleep, thanks to these big thud!s. Even I did, once - and be in the know that I do tidur mati OK. And Jenny B's attributing the latest zit outbreaks to these noises which had yanked her out of sleepdome these past few nights.

If you think the thud!s and the louder thud!s were bad, get this - sometimes they "move furniture" during the wee hours too, and you'll get to hear the teeth-gritting dragging of something heavy, something kinda wood-ish and big-ish, across the marble floor. And I cringe just imagining what state their marble floor would look like by now.

It's like every night they've dropped an RM50 note behind the dressing table, and they have to move the table to get it, and then move the table back to its place.

Or maybe it wasn't an RM50 note that slid to the back of the dressing table.

Maybe it was a little plastic tub of Bobbi Brown lipstick and the Maybelline mascara. Maybe it was the tiny Red Earth lip gloss and a blob of SaSa glittering eye-shadow.

Cause we also get to hear a noise that sounds like a couple of dice being thrown onto the floor. Or maybe the couple was playing that kampung game of bottlecaps.

But the sound we hate most was the hammering sound! That off-key tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk! - a couple of seconds of silence - then tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk! rythm was driving all four of us crazy!

It was everytime when the tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk! sound came that Nad said if it persists, she's going to go up and tell the couple off. She was going to tell them to be quiet, and stop all kinds of carpentry work after 7PM.

Of course, everytime Nad said that, the hammering (as if the people above could hear us) ceased...

But here's the other thing. Last night, the hammering, after the routine threat was issued, did not cease! So Nad was already on her feet, persuading Jenny B to come with her, ready to give the neighbour a piece of her mind.

I was about to let her go, musing about going as well, when I suddenly thought of asking, "Yo Nad, you sure you wanna do it?"

And she retorted, (not quickly enough, though - interrupted by a series of tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk!) "Hell, yeah!"

Suddenly the worst went through my mind (Hehehe Ariel, I gotta credit you for these frightening thoughts - remember you told me about that film, Saw? Ah, what would I do without your inspiration input kekekeekeh!).

And out of the vision that flashed through my brain, I said in frantic:

"What if our neighbour turned out to be a psycho? And the thud! was them putting a body onto a table. And the louder thud! was them on nights they have someone obese?

"And the dragging sound was them pushing the table, with the body on top, to go under the bigger-watt light?

"And the dice-throwing sound came out when they've chopped off the body's fingers, and the one that makes the loudest dice-throwing sound was the melantun-lantun fingers with rings and bling-blings attached?

"And the hammering was them placing the chopped body parts into a coffin?"

"Imagine them going like this... (And I did a quick charade routine: an axe on my hand, my face expressionless, and I go swing-haiyak, swing-haiyak, swing-haiyak, chopping an imaginary object placed on an imaginary table)..."

"And then you show up in front of their door!" And I shivered - exaggerated a bit for emphasis on the thrill factor of the outlook presented.

"ARGH!!! Ei! melampau betul imaginasi kau nih!" Nad and Jenny B cursed, appreciating my bloody fiction.

Then my sister said, "No, remember Poltergist? Yeah, the latest one, where they show how it all started?" she asked enthusiastically.

And just as enthusiastically Nad nodded. Encouraged by Nad's respond, my sister calmly pointed to the window nearest to us, and calmly continued:

"Well imagine how bout as we're talking like this, our neighbour above do a poltergistic swing down and ask, "WHAT WAS THAT?"... "


And the hammering sound from above stopped...

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Gulp, gulup, gelap!

We were waiting for our order of McDonald's to arrive - dang, sometimes their delivery service can cause so much anxiety among hungry writers. As we waited we bitched about the orange drink that goes with the Prosperity Burger - some like it, some don't, and I said if my tongue's on chilli fire, I'd gulp it down anyway.

And suddenly the lights blinked, twice, then it died off altogether. "Yeah! Blackout!"

If you still can't guess it, we love blackouts. Alright, alright, us who have filed their story, or waiting for some PR lady to feed us with the information we need, or simply do not have anything much to do was enjoying the blackout.

We looked around to find if anyone's in distress, and, erm, nope. No one was! So the only legittimate grumble would still be on the late delivery of our respective McDonald's order.

And then the lights came back on! And the PCs rebooted themselves. Darn, it was the bloody generator! Aw man, that means no half-day would be issued. And where the heck is the McDonald's guy anyway?

Just as we were about to shout "We hate McDonalds!" the lights went off again. Moments after that someone called out to say the guy has just arrived. What? No Prosperity Twister fries to go with the burger? Insane!

Oh, apparently their fryer's down - no electricity maa.. OK, long, straight, cokkeng* fries will do then.

Then one by one reporters came back in to announce:

"Oh, JB's having a blackout as well!"

"Heard it started from Batu Pahat or something like that?"

"Maybe the whole central-southern block of the Peninsula is affected..."

"Traffic lights semua not on lah. And the traffic outside's gone haywire!"

"Ooh, we nearly got caught in the lift twice, once just now in Mutiara, second time just down there in the office lobby."

"Just now Ken's mom called and she said Seremban is already into its second hour of blackoutlah."

"Eh got a call from a PR from the 3 o'clock's assignment - she said KLCC's guards not allowing people to enter the building nor cars into the carpark."

"Baguslah tu, cause C who was on her way there just called to say cabs would not take passengers anyway and they've closed the LRT stations."

"There's already reports of jammed phone lines... Hey, my hubby hasn't replied my SMSla."

"I just got an SMS from Z, he said he'd love to come to work but his car ran out of gas, and since the petrol station's having a blackout as well, he's stuck with a bunch of bored sweaty angry hungry motorists somewhere before the Kajang toll. Now he can't even go back!"

On and on they report and compared input. And I asked, "Will my Equatorial assignment at 5.30 this eve be cancelled as well?"

When I didn't get any positive feedback from those present at the Editorial area, I went on with vengeance - "Habislah TNB esok..."

"Yeah, they'd be fried by the newshounds!"

"Well, we need some answers, right?"

Yeah, what was the reason of the blackout? Who and which areas were affected? How much loss suffered? So how now?

*cokkeng means erect, protruding or tersembul keluar in Terengganu dialect. Right Yana? And I still want my happy curly fries!

Fast facts on...


Yes, Cannes - France's "most glamourous of all the towns on the coast and is renowned worldwide for its annual Film Festival".

Fast Fact 1
Cannes was once a small fishing vilage, now a favourite retreat among the rich with a population of 60,000. There are still fishermen, with wooden boats doing their thing around the old port area.

Fast Fact 2
Besides the Cannes Film Festival, there are other cultural and industrial festivals and conventions that take place there all year round. Among others, the 3GSMWC (work, man..).

Fast Fact 3
Have two public beaches, but if those are crowded the Plages du Midi (located west of the old town Le Suquet) is also an option. (Should I bring my bikini?)

Fast Fact 4
Where to shop: Rue d'Antibes, which is the main shopping street that has both luxury shops and plenty of other options for shoppers with modest budget (that's me!). Also, the near the area of the old port, where there are narrow streets filled with interesting little shops.

Fast Fact 5
Where to eat: The old town, specifically Rue Saint Antoine is lined up with restaurants. Also Rue Felix Faure if you love fish, and Rue Meynadier, which is long street full of bakers, cheese shops and pasta (oui!) of all variety.

Fast Fact 6
Currency: Used to be France Francs, but since February 2002 it has been changed to Euro. Current exchange rate: 1.00 EUR Euro = 5.04332 MYR Malaysia Ringgits. Tolong!

Fast Fact 7
Weather check: Last year's February average was 12'C, with maximum 20'C and minimum 8'C. (Ookaaaayyy... maybe I should forget about the two public beaches I mentioned earlier...)

Fast Fact 8
Language: (Tongue-rolling, nose-pinching) French. (Oui, merci, moi, RSVP... don't think I know anything else besides those...)


Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Ti-grrrrr cupped!

OUR so-called "dangerous" lot of football players " cheated" some 60,000 fans - so sez one local tabloid I spied this morning. NST claimed we've been hit by an attack measured 4 on the Richter scale.

Have to credit the Indonesian team - eventhough I didn't watch the game (out of fear of jinxing it) I bet they must have bentes-ed our team left and right last night. Took full advantage of our lack of semangat juang and of course, skills, and celebrated with some 10,000 Indonesian fans present at the stadium - kudos!

No, I'm noit being unpatriotic - I just happen to agree with the sports reporter that our side "simply didn't have the quality to earn a place in the Tiger Cup final."

If it's any consolation, I do think Kit Kong is kinda cute.