The langsing-phone

I quite like the simple, SGH-D520, one of the latest handphones from Samsung - just look at these nice photos I captured using the "slim fit slide up" model...


^ Action shot: Look at this lovely group, Bob, Battrisya the niece flanked by her auntie Helen and next is her uncle Fari...


^ Posed look: The three guys - Lan (now father to three boys) who used to dance asli steps to the latest rock kapak songs, Bob (now fruitarian) who used to be the new-age guy (still is huh) and Fari (now almost Australian PR-holder but shall always be first Malaysian) who used to have bigger hair than this... Sorry didn't frame this nice pix nicely, I was just getting used to the phone then...


^ And here's the phone with Bob on display - tengok muncung dia - he was saying "No! No!" - not to the baby, but to me over my saying that this shot will end up in my blog somehow...

FIFA World Cup™ Final: Closing ceremony

As the 2006 Cup chase ends, let us sing a song to commemorate this vonderful ending... Tak sesia team ni jadi favourite gue since '96 lagi...

Yeahhh, let's sing-sing-song to the tune of Geylang Si Paku Geylang! Geylang si paku geylang, geylang si rama-rama Pulang pergilah pulang, Perancis-lah pulang balik ke Paris... ah * Menang! Itali dah menang! Itali-pun pulang bersama trofi...ek ah!

CAUTION: Repeat * as many times as you like, but blogger cannot be held responsible should you choose to sing loudly in front of:
1] German, Brazil and England supporters
2] sports desk reporters/journalists who earlier predicted that Italians will go back "to clean their scandal-ridden game" even before their clash with Germany took place
3] This particular telco's marketing people who came up with the so-de-very-tak-kena nationwide marketing campaign which tried to leverage on the World Cup hype but featured a number of people who weren't even playing in the FIFA World Cup™ Final instead - like my mate A says, they probably don't even know Giggs is Welsh!

note: Photo of skipper Cannavaro above belongs to http://fifaworldcup.yahoo.com

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

And I will let go a chance to date the whole of the Italian football team for a dinner date on a Caribbean beach with Johnny Depp - my crush since the days Freddie first claimed Elm Street his, my love since Faizal Hussein began dating Nasha Aziz...

Of course my love did not disappoint me - he asked me out for breakfast instead. So there I was yesterday morning, 10.30AM sharp, nowhere special just Midvalley's GSC, inside Hall 10, dark and cold the silver screen spewing out beer ads.

And then he arrived, with a gunshot from a watery grave, from the sea onto his resurrected Black Pearl. He is, as he always is, his lovely self.

Not clean - personal hygine is a trifle matter, he says.

However, always in swagger and style.

Not sober - though he wondered why the rum's always gone, when he could not stand straight on his sea-legs he remembered where it all went.

Though savvy and articulate still.

Not afraid - send in an old enemy, a selfish seductress, a betrayed friend even a terror from the deep sea; there's a plan somewhere up his sleeve.

But inevitably and unfortunately, cursed.

And so will you be the moment you walk out of the cinema - you'll be doomed to suffer another year of agonizing wait...

Be nice, tis wise

Oscar Wilde, the author who calls Beauty a form of genius, said this:
"Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much."

I first saw this quote in NSTP some years ago, and today an email from an old friend came warning me thatI should keep my guards up against Fats. And the quote reverberates.

(Of course, the other quote that echos in my mind was something taken off an A. Samad Said play, which goes like this:

"Kau cantik Pinkie! Kau cantik!"
- Lantai T. Pinkie

It simply explains why pretty people like me usually have a lot to go through that some people will never get to experience - because you are pretty. Haiyo, susah lo jadi cantik. Hehehe!)

This part of the famous Rudyard Kipling poem also comes to mind:

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise...
- If

Thanks for the warning bro, but I think I'll try slim down the Fats in my own way.

Kenapa ramai gal-gals minat England

Over lunch I heard some interesting theories on why most gals tend to support England, and not even a g-string-male-model drenched team such as Italy could come near:

Theory :
Cause they want to be in the "in crowd" and England is the so-called "in". (Likewise Brazil).

Theory :
Cause they've actually heard of EPL, but no way in hell could they ever guess who plays in Serie A or Bundesliga or even heard of MPPJ or MyTeam.

Theory :
Cause they can check out what the players' wives are wearing, and then tiru la. Hey, Posh isn't Posh for nothing, betul tak?

Theory :
Cause when someone asks who's their favorite player, they can always say the household name "Beckham!" with confidence, no one would dare call their bluff. And if there's a follow-up question, e.g.: Who else do you think plays well? They can say "Rooney!" (Though once I did overhear a gal said "Ronaldinho of course!"). Two players to memorise - good enough lo.

Theory :
Cause when they get together with their boyfriend's best friends' girlfriends and talk about the hipster Rooney's girlfriend was wearing was looking "off at the side", they can claim they're talking ball.

Theory :
Cause their boyfriends support England. (Likewise those whose boyfriends support Brazil)

Theory :
Cause when someone bitch about Beckham or Rooney, they can always say "But they've got a better-half who's tough to handle... Unlike me, me very supportive of my boipren one..." (Which is a real neat trick actually! You go girls!)

Wah... music everywhere..

Check this out man... (Thought my last post from this really expensive city should be memorable so...)


^ Come sing-sing-sing-a-long with this toilet bowl...

And these are for guys out there...


^ City girl - just one of them here, waiting for someone at the "loyal dog" statue. Yess.. kisah seekor anjing setia yang bernama Hatchinko.


^ Working city girls riding the Metro line... black seems to be the only corporate colour around here.

Outside the window on the 8th floor by...

... day!


^ These guys were cleaning up my bedroom window at 10+AM this morning, sporting enough to smile as I took time off to press the shutter. Behind them some kind of construction is going on, tis a good thing they showed up to beautify the scenery. Two of them here so one for Kak Mazni, one for Intan loh!

... night!


^ I wish the view outside my window is this nice, but no, I have to go to the lift area to get this nice city lights.. This one's for Tauke Ling who should be here to shop with me and bear the sakit kaki!

Anatawa is-so connected-to!

Getting Internet connection - at a place where you've never set foot before, a place where kind strangers can't really talk to you, a place where your 2G handphone can't roam, a place where you have no one to call a friend, a place where you feel sooooo seorang like that, plus the fact that you're there not for fun but work - is always an omen of a good start.

OK lah so I got Internet connection, what's so great about that huh. Try 30mbps zooming in the moment you plug in the RJ-45. Yeah baby yeah, that's what I'm talking about! The photo I posted here is a 2048 pixel thingy and guess how many seconds it took for me to upload it up to Blogger - 3 seconds (1 Mississippi...).

The bus was just turning to the place I wanted to arrive at, get some sleep.. and already got hal loh... Check my next photo, it is of a guy being stopped by a security officer - gosh hope he's not in trouble - or maybe he is being a nuisance so... but the reason i quickly snapped was out of admiration to the kawai-ne girl behind him, yep she's stickin with her man no matter what. Heehhee bet my photojournalism teacher might like my photo here...


^ Wonder what really happened up there - was about 9.30AM local time then. People in black suits (literally - I mean, everyone seems to be in black suits here) were just getting to work and these two youngsters are already in a situation. Hope tis nothing serious and we all can live happily ever after again. Wonder if you guys can see that the girl is actually looking dead straight at the camera.. Jangan marah beb! Wa tershutterfrenzied..

Piece of news that makes go "Hmm.. egg or chicken?"

The thing about the egg or chicken dilemma, what ever the outcome maybe, it does not really affect anyone who happens to not have any problems with enjoying both forms.

Let's face it, eggs are eggs - despite being infamous for its high cholesterol content, we still love it cause tis really hard not to. And someone tend to mention something about being high in protein, which theoretically means, good loh!

Remember coming home from school one hot afternoon, when dead leaves give out a nice crushing sound when you step on it. 14, latch-key veteran, hungry. HUNGRY.

Need something delicious, hot, quick, easy - now.

Zombied into the lonely kitchen, glanced a bit at yesterday's gulai lemak and zoomed straight to the fridge. Opened the clasped door - felt a rush of cool air - smelt the whiff of raw veggies - and there it is - them eggs.

Sitting quietly on the top right corner - eggs. Shell intact, lovely brown hue - eggs. Breakable but in other ways tough.

Grabbed one - once sitting on palm, heard the devil said tis too small. Tried closing the fridge's door but it was too late - left hand had swiped another one and leg quickly put things to stop. Barely saw it move but suddenly the fridge's closed.

Then lightning fast - pan, stove, fire, broken shells - flipping motion - done.

And behold on the kitchen dining table - le kicap. The dark ink of slum origins that makes everything in the world all nice. With a number of black pearly drops and a little twist even the simple fried eggs seems gourmet.

Chicken it's a different matter.

Slaughter. De-bulu-ing. Cutting. Cleaning. Cooking. Ooh what hassle. Eat.

Another formula - drive to Jaya Jusco. Go to poultry section. Pick desired chicken part. Pay. Go back. Cook. Realised don't have enough ingredients. Upon the brink of giving up, decides to just fry them chicken. So fry. Eat.

Yet another formula - go to mamak stall. Sit. Order chicken. Eat. Get a shock upon paying. Realised actually in Mahboob hence the startling price.

In many ways I see eggs denoting simplicity, chicken complexity.

So when a piece of news hits and the first thing that crossed mind was, "Hmm, egg or chicken? Chicken or egg?", tend to get a gut feeling that says this is something that will never be solved, and even if it is, it doesn't really matter now, does it?

Beautiful Beserah

Here's a luverly photo I took with my beloved Nokia 6600 of Beserah beach in Pahang, plus a couple more. Yes moi went on hol and came back happy... Yes this entry is a finally a happy one cause I'm in the process of letting go all of the bad vibes in the hen/duck coop...


^ The serene Beserah beach snapped at fast pace - since no one trust my driving I get to lepak in the car and go shutter crazy.


^ Nasi dagang found en-route to Chukai from Cherating.


^ Ah, Chukai's own Malayan Banking Berhad! What a wonderful sight when you're running out of cash!

Don't agree with me, but it's true that...

... the farmer of the coop is a weirdo who always goes missing till its an hour before the coop's closing time.

... the farmer of the coop thinks one's part time job should take more hours into one's real day job and that would not create trouble for the hens in the coop.

... the farmer is a nutjob who thinks everything can be turned into edible chicken poop in three tangy flavours.

... the farmer is so stupid thinking that the fact that most of the hens are keeping quiet in the coop because they truly do not have any more shit to deliver (when in truth, the hens are always a bunch of creative productive poultry).

... the farmer is so shallow and spineless that all the hens in the coop are now ducks. Yes ducks, ducks paddling in the water, ducks, that what the hens are all now.

M! The Ops!pera

Riding on the crowd's current flavour for theatre offerings (thanks to PGL hype) M! The Opera finally came to me last night.

First impression:
- "Wah seats baekk punya! Thanks a lot Abang Badak Biru Yang Tak Dapat Balik Kampung Raya Tahun Lalu!"

Second impression:
- Eh, apesal lambat start nih?

Continuing on:
- Hmm... chaosnye opening act dia... Vocals tenggelam dek orchestra la pulak... Nasib ade subtitles... Besides, the set looks Oscar-ly inspired glam!
- Oh M masa kecik-kecik dulu rupenye - ha ha ha... quite funny lah Azean!
- And that "pondan" character - hmm, familiar, oh yeah saw him in the same kebaya outfit in Ghazal Party Queen last year, ooh didn't know he/she could sing that well - voice control and projection baekk gitu!
- Why lah everyone keep measuring each other's breasts ni - kot iye pun tukang jahit takkan la tak amik ukuran kat tempat lain kot? Sukatila cik director and choreographer...

More acts down the road:
- Hmm... best juga lagu "There is no time... There is no time..." layan.. layan... *eh interrupted* "Paula Malai Ali punya breasts pun kena ukur on stage juga!" says a friend.
- From another friend: "Perasan tak bila tengok lama-lama, texture muka Khir Rahman sama la dengan father dia A. Rahman Hassan!" Says I back to her: "Texture muka ye Intan?"
- And Khir's most memorable line tonight goes something like this: "Apesal nak stress? It's only a dress!"

Intermission:
- Ooh... ramenye kaum artists... Shuhaimi Bab the film director, Rafi the guitarist, tu sape ke tu - "Roy Azman la.." says my friend. And that deejay... And model Bernice Chan... And actress from Bolehwood... And the actor who played Rahim Razali's first son in Split Gravy on Rice...
- Eh eh big big boss aku pun ade? Takde lah tinggi sangat. Senyumlah, senyumlah ahai cek mek - Aiyoyo kadavoley he smiled back! Quick must transfer very important sub-conscious message to his brain wavelength now: ~Bagi~la~ bonus~... ~Bagi~la~bonus~...!
- A mate was asking, how come the girls are all singing soprano? My take on that: The men have to ultra-low and females ultra-high so that the pondan's vocal range can be slotted in the middle. Tis only fair. Ahhah...

After intermission:
- Aik dah ade yang dah balik? "Don't they want to know the ending?" asks my officemate. "Agaknye they could not connect with the opera kot?" says moi back.
- Eh dah start - ek awat jadi lagu nih? Sepi ni still the angel or already a devil? Didn't she had something going on with that pelat Kerabat just now?
- Wow, that has got to be M's second most memorable line tonight: He goes, "Kahwiiiin dengan akuuuu!"
- Ooo... camtu rupanye... ala.. habis camni je ke? Anti-climax la pulak...

After the show:
- The same officemate asks, "So how would you rate it?" Says I, "To me, my benchmark would be how much they managed to connect with the audience. Actually I'm kinda disappointed that Jit, S.Rastam, Jo & co didn't get under my skin this time.. Ops! But it's not fair to compare M! with their previous works, which are all of a different genre.."
- Oops terserempak - singer Shafinaz still remember her super juniors la.. suka la si Pipa dengan Intan tu!
- Teh tarik at Pelita anyone? Four takers - reminiscing the days of Split Gravy on Rice, Bolehwood and Gross Indecency: Three Trials of Oscar Wilde and Alang Rentak Seribu. Just when I thought one drama is enough for one night, another one kick-starts... Oops!

The desired effect brought on by nasi beringin

For those who know what nasi beringin is all about, you know this is true.

When you that lousy environment in the coop and you just want to zombie through the day, go as fast as you can to the little nasi beringin stall. Ask for the whole magical she-bang, that's what you need to do:

"Full, not half serving of that spell-bound rice you must start with."

"Ayam Goreng or Daging Rendang on the plate next (or both, see if you dare)."

"Side-sambal of tentacled seafood or cholesterol drained egg to complement the ensemble."

"And semi-fermented vegetable at default setting you'll always get."

"Lastly swear for that one time you must against all caffeine-infested antidote liquid - fend yourself against the temptation of Kopi "C" Ais and NesLo Ais from Yoges (don't trust the smile from the drinkmaker who sells Amway stuff on the sideline)."

Then eat... eeeeeeat! Eat and get zonked out.

And that you will succumb to right after you hear you tell your lunch mates "Naah, we don't have a fixed lunch time..."

Be zombie! Be merry!

Tribute to Pressure

Note to Ariel: Yah babes, I shoulda listened to you - must fly the coop before I go crazy. The subsods win again - fuck them all, fuck the nloody anal guy who protects them first instead of me. They're all wankers glazed with nutmeg and whipped cream plus a dash of chocolate sprinkles, all ready to be tied with barbwire then castrated inch by inch (as SC always suggests) then fed to the ants part by part and left for dead right in the middle of Saruman's monster-makin lab and right before they close their eyes and block their brains from thinking you quote that 3 year old kid you overheard at the party and say, "Babi gedik!"... Whoa, that feels good. The kid really knows his stuff.

On days you just want to tell everyone in the coop "Fuck you! And you! And you too!", sing along to this David Bowie & Queen song in your head:

Under Pressure
Mm ba ba de
Um bum ba de
Um bu bu bum da de

Pressure pushing down on me
Pressing down on you no man ask for
Under pressure - that burns a building down
Splits a family in two
Puts people on streets

Um ba ba be
Um ba ba be
De day da
Ee day da - that's o.k.

It's the terror of knowing
What the world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher

Pressure on people - people on streets
Day day de mm hm
Da da da ba ba O.k.

Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor
These are the days it never rains but it pours

Ee do ba be
Ee da ba ba ba
Um bo bo
Be lap
People on streets - ee da de da de
People on streets - ee da de da de da de da

It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher high high

Pressure on people - people on streets
Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Keep coming up with love but it's so slashed and torn
Why - why - why?

Love love love love love
Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking
Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Why can't we give love that one more chance
Why can't we give love give love give love give love give love give love give love give love give love
'Cause love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for

The people on the edge of the night
And loves dares you to change our way of
Caring about ourselves
This is our last dance
This is our last dance
This is ourselves

Under pressure
Under pressure
Pressure

P/S: I hate bad days. The coop should really get me a shooting range plus some ammo to work with on days like this, cause I'm not about to be called unproductive. Let me at least shoot the idiots out of the picture.

Must see: The Producers

If you like comedy, music, stylized dancin' and you LOL-ing in the cinema, the film The Producers will make you do just that. I was lucky enough to get a seat in the press screening just this morning and I'm glad I got out of bed early.


Betul, sakit perut ketawa yang sangat tak tahan oohh... Coming to you this March 30th, 2006.
Photo courtesy of Yahoo!Movies and Universal Pictures

I bet if IB brings the play in, it'll cost you some RM100 just to get the way above seats at the upper circle! So since you can enjoy this gem at RM10...

A tiny moment of wallowing in self-pity

Today's NST (Pg 20) article titled "Ex-gratia for MAS staff" reports that as part of a strategy to boost morale, all MAS staff will receive RM1,000 each later this month. This move will cost the company RM21-freakin-million.

That's three times the amount this coop needs to give all of its hens one month bonus, moreover the coop just reported some 40+% increase in profit tu! Comparatively MAS has a loss of a whopping RM1.3-freakin-freakin-billion last year alone!

Mak ai! Apekah maa'na nya semua ini? I don't know what makes sense anymore!

Do I need to distract myself with news on Mawi's appoinment as KL Tower ambassador or Siti's alleged affair with Datuk K being disahkan?

Frustrated, I am. Shan't be able to stop myself from turning to the dark side! (Turning right now...)

O Darth Maul, o sith with red and black melon colour-scheme head....
Rise thou from ashes...
And grant me apprenticeship...!

Can call me Darth Makan oso! (Pun not intended!)

p/s: Can someone remember the lyrics of Sudirman's Merisik Khabar? Need to sing that now since can't get the PGLM tune that goes "Melaka... Oh Melaka..." tune outta my head!

PGLM extended - I knew it!

Except that I still don't know if I'll get tickets - the IB line has been busy since I started calling this morning...

The only thing I can do right now is be a Malaysian - If got, got lah. If no got, no got lah.

Valentine oh Valentine

Yesterday I saje-saje caught a photo of my friend, who was mengelamun again as usual (she really digs mengelamuning for some odd reason and even tell people ahead if she's about to lapse into a session so that we won't bother her till she's done - beat that!).

As advised via the speaker on Mobile Film Clinic (hosted by Nokia and Discovery Networks Asia), I placed my friend slightly off-centre on the "right thirds of the grid" plus gave her some "looking room" - that achieved, and I managed to capture a couple in action as well:


^ My mengelamuning friend is not the guy who has that nicely rounded, balding head nor the siamese twin joined at the crotch.

Sigh, they've prolly caught the Valentine's bug. Looks like Asians on the street have truly embraced that popular TV culture, public show of affection and such... Funnylah, when we don ketayap, light pelitas and ask for money in red packets we call it staying true to our Oriental culture, but is that the extent of it?

Wedding in the digital era

I recently attended a friend's wedding, and look how high-tech we've all become...


^ Nak pergi Teluk Intan je, tapi siap guna GPS module tuh...


^ Video/photographers with manual SLRs still stand out but me from my seat can catch some cool shots too with my trusty ol' cameraphone..

Message in the ang pows

The Dog Year, from what I've gathered from conversations here and there, is a year that requires one to work harder. True enough - when I didn't work hard collecting ang pow from my favourite Oriental uncles, I was rewarded with a measly RM10 of total collection.

RM10! That's 50% decline from my previous year's achievement!

If red packets be considered as a sign of times to come, I'll say we're heading for a rough year ahead. With oil prices expected to reach the three figure per barrel and the government's subtle hints that they can no longer increase subsidies... go figure.

A friend emphasized, "I even got a packet that has RM4 in it, can you believe it?! It's like saying death is a better option than the future that lies ahead! Siau hoh!"

Luckily being a Malay, RM4 doesn't carry a bad omen for me. In fact the number is actually, sincerely and mathematically 50% better than the RM2 I got from the nice biscuit lady at the Gunung Rapat market (not that I'm ungrateful, just being analytical here).

Hence generously I offered, "Hey if you don't want it, I can take care of it for you..." She didn't surrender that particular ang pow she was talking about, though, but at least I tried.