Alt lyrics to Malaysia's 55th National Day Theme Song

A friend was appalled with the newly released 55th National Day Theme Song - Janji Ditepati. She says "Am I supposed to be impressed by this?"

To which I replied, "Lyrics coulda been written better..". I really didn't mind the message the song aimed to convey, but I really wished it wasn't as badly written, which I feel seems like done in haste and bad taste. I sounded as if it was done after the BR1M and Kedai1Malaysia exercise, but before things like TRX and Genovasi was announced, or those would've been mentioned in the rap part too, you wanna bet? And what about Klinik1Malaysia, Kedai Ikan 1Malaysia and Kedai Kain 1Malaysia? Doesn't merit a mention as well?

The first two lines of the original lyrics started out quite bad with the word "macam" instead of "bagai", which I feel has a bit more class when it comes to Malay literature.



The rockbottom part of the lyrics was "Janji sudah ditepati, Kini masa balas budi". OMG, I dunno where to start with these two lines. Cheesy? Too literal? No finesse? How about substituting it with "Duit sudah kita bagi, Bukan dacing jangan undi" if you must, if you really want the message to be properly and irreversibly branded onto people's mind... Apologies for this ranting but this is my opinion and the song made no doubt that it is a pro-gov song. I am one of those on the fence peeps, but music is a big part of me and I can't tolerate something this bad.
 
There's really many more ways to deliver a rephrase of Kennedy's "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country", which I believe to be the core idea of those two lines of super bad lyrics, but as another friend quipped, "That may be the real intention, but using Google Translate won't help!"


But instead just giving a bad comment and further dissing, I thought I might as well provide an alternative. So I started doodling at 1.31PM just now, and turns out it is not that hard to cough up a few corny lines like this, and hey, I used Google Translate too! It may not be a Loloq-esque cryptic work of art, but here's my attempt at the lyrics:

Alternative lyrics to Malaysia's 55th National Day Theme Song - Janji Ditepati
Menyusuri era baru
Melangkaui babak lalu
Kita kan terus berdiri
Setinggi iltizam hati
Walau kita berbeza
Azam kita tetap sama
Bina rakyat cemerlang
Jadi warga yang terbilang
Cita-cita yang mulia
Masyarakat yang berbudi

(Chorus)
Apa guna bersengketa
Ayuh kita wujudkan integrasi
Apa guna berseteru
Ayuh kita merdekakanlah diri

(Rap skit!)
Apa makna merdeka? Bebas dari angkara
Apa rasa merdeka? Bangga dengan Malaysia
Apakah janji kita? Pertahan bumi kita
Tepati janji kita Malaysia terus merdeka



In case you wanna sing the original, here goes (courtesy of umplife and YouTube):
Lirik Lagu Janji Ditepati: 
Macam malam ikut siang
macam bulan ikut matahari
1Malaysia terus berjuang
Janji Kita ditepati
Kata Kita dikota
Janji Kita ditepati
Hidup Rakyat Dibela
Masa Depan Diberkati
Janji sudah ditepati
Kini masa balas budi

(Chorus)
Janji siapa? Janji kita
Janji APa? Janji 1Malaysia
Janji Siapa? Janji kita
Janji Apa? Janji 1Malaysia

Ini janji kita BR1M 1Malaysia
Ini janji 1Malaysia
BR1M 1Malaysia
Kata kita dikota
Kini 1Malaysia Janji kita ditepati
Kedai 1Malaysia